Thursday, November 1, 2012

30 Days, 30 Posts: Adoption

I had my first post for my 30 Day Journey: Adoption all ready go.  It had been edited by my wonderful sister-in-law and I had even dropped in a few statistics (such as,30% of Americans have considered adopting but as of 2002, only 2% have done so, and UNICEF estimates the number of orphans at 210 million in the world today).  But, I’m going rogue and instead I’m going to write a bit more from the heart.

Adoption can be wonderful, full of blessings and a really wonderful thing.  But, it can also be messy, scary, costly, emotionally draining, it strains friendships and family ties and the craziest thing of all is:
...suddenly you are walking around with your deepest desires, feelings and beliefs      
     regarding how you are going to build this, family, all out in the open.  Your heart is on    
     your sleeve, so to speak, for everyone to witness, judge or comment about.  Some days I   
     could talk your ear off about adoption and other days I really want to look the person in 
     the eye and “it’s none of your business.”  (It's not nice I know, but just how I feel.)
When Jamie and I decided to to start our family, which resulted our lovely daughter LBean, we did not have to get a police clearance, a financial statement, a letter of employment, finger-printed, interviewed by a social worker, reference letters and no one knew that we were trying to start our family.  It was private.  That special time, where it is just a secret between Jamie and I, is not present in this journey, but it doesn’t make it any less real or special.  I also appreciate that while I bemoan about the lack privacy, I am also writing about it on a blog!  Irony is dually noted.

As I share with you what I have learned about adoption and what makes a family, please remember that:
If you are married, you have no genetic tie to your spouse
If you have known the love of a step-parent or step-siblings, there is no DNA that made      
            it possible
If you enjoy doting on your spouse’s nieces and nephew, like I do, it is not because you 
           are compelled by forces of nature to do so

It is not DNA that makes a family, it is love and a strong commitment to make this crazy plan work.

November is “Adoption Awareness Month”.  Because this is something very close to our family’s heart, but not something that I have blogged about much, I am taking the whole month to share with you what our family has learned along the way.  

I feel that I have only begun to understand a small piece of the adoption community, and there are many different perspectives, but I invite you to join me as we “change, grow, and find adventure” in this part of our family’s journey.  The welcome mat is out, the green tea is hot and I’m ready to talk!

This week I am focusing on Learning the Lingo, and next week I’ll share more about our family’s adoption journey.  Each Friday I am going to try and highlight a family that is also on their own adoption journey.  Tomorrow I will introduce you to the first “Friday’s Family”. See you then!

My statistics were taken from and

And, to see where I got the crazy idea to write every day for a here!


  1. Not that it has anything to do with adoption, but Holly Spangler is also doing a 30 Days segment about agriculture on her Prairie Farms blog-and she's including a number of other 4-H House alums as well!

    PS-I have a co-worker who is "this close" to having their adoption dreams realized. They are waiting for their invitation to travel to China. They are hoping that November will be THE month for them!

    1. Sheryl, that is great! I will have to check out Holly's blog and for your co-worker, if there is anything I can do to help or hints/tricks to know when traveling, please pass along my contact information. I would be happy to help in any way that I can.

  2. Good for you Kara! This is not an easy topic to cover while you are in the midst of it. It is such a rewarding and loving choice for all involved and once you have come through the other side, becomes much easier to share. Our thoughts and prayers are with you and your family and pray it turns out just as you hoped!

    1. Thanks Tami! We are certainly ready to come through to the other side! We have been so blessed to be surrounded by friends and family, both in the US and here in China that "get it". So glad that you are a part of that group!