Surviving (and Sometimes Thriving) in Xi'an

We have made it through the first six months in Xi’an!  Some days it was merely surviving and other days we did thrive.  Because these six months have required a lot of living, there hasn’t been much time to write about it.  Although I did compose many blog posts in my head.  Does that count?

Here is our recap of the first six months…

Leaving Suzhou

We moved from Suzhou to Xi’an.  We watched our boxes be delivered to an incomplete apartment, which means we had no appliances, air conditioners, lights, etc.  We couldn’t actually stay in the apartment, but yet I needed to be there during the day to supervise workers.

And, arriving in Xi'an.  Bikes were the first thing
to be unpacked!

We returned to the US for a month to get in as much quality time with family and friends as possible.  We also had doctor’s appointments, check-ups and other not-so-fun things.  In the US, we would be able to spread those appointments out over 12 months, but we were on a time crunch, so it was all crammed into 4 weeks.

Happy 4th of July to us...on our way to the US.

In August we carted our 10+ pieces of checked luggage back to Xi’an and moved into our apartment.  It was livable, but still not complete.  On our first night in the apartment I really, really wanted to make myself an egg.  We didn’t have a lot of groceries and not all of our boxes were unpacked, but I thought I could make myself an egg.  Wrong!  The ignitor for our gas stove worked, but upon closer inspection, we realized that the gas line had never been installed to the stove.  That required another worker to come and drill a hole in the countertop and then run the hose to the stove.

Hmmm, what else have we experienced?  Well, I thought that after living here for 4 years that surely we had acclimated our digestive systems to most of the intestinal challenges we might encounter.  We battled a few rounds of tummy troubles (affectionally known as Suzhou-stomach in our house) after a some meals out and one afternoon barbecue in the mountains.  It might have been the local produce, it might have been that the knives that were used to cut our BBQ meat were washed in the nearby stream, or it could have been something else.  Needless to say, Xi’an still had some surprises for us.

New school and no uniforms.

All three girls started school and we worked through a new routine for drop-off, pick-up and homework.  We got a puppy, which hasn’t been as challenging as I expected….though, I did set the bar extremely low, so anything seemed positive.

We took Oreo with us to a barbecue in the mountains.

We traveled to Dubai for October holiday.  It was amazing and some day I hope to blog about that!

Our first desert safari.

LBean and I have been traveling to Shanghai every few months for her orthodontist appointments.  Our  2-1/2 hour plane ride for a medical appointment makes me wistful for when it only took 10 minute drive (and three stoplights) to get to the dentist.  You can read about the time we went to Shanghai on the wrong weekend for LBean's appointment here: Piece of Humble Pie.

There is a lot of water on my floor!

Oh, and there was that time the workers came to turn on the in-floor heating and our living room floor flooded.  And, it was one week before Thanksgiving guests rolled in…that was awesome.  We mopped up 5 buckets full of water, moved furniture and dragged our new rug out to the patio and now we get to watch the remaining water creep up the walls in our apartment.  It’s going to take a few weeks for the workers to tear up all the tile in our living room and dining room and then fix the problem.  Merry Christmas to us!

So, most of that was just surviving.  But, there have been lots of thriving days too.  We love the people we have met, both local Chinese and other expats!  We have really enjoyed having families over for dinner, hosting parties, and trying to build community with new friends. 

We can fit a lot of people in our apartment and I'm so glad!

I’ve done a lot of thinking and comparing of Xi’an to Suzhou and here is my chart of “Here versus There”:

Here (XI’an)	There (Suzhou)
Noodles! We’re in the north, people eat noodles.	Rice (breakfast, lunch and dinner)
Rou jia mo (Xi’an hamburger-kind of)	Suzhou’s got nothing like this
Mountains	Water canals
Pollution (better in the Spring, Summer, & Fall)	Pollution (at least we have them beat in the winter)
Northern dialect (words end with the ‘r’ sound)	Southern dialect (no ‘r’ on the end)
American international school for LBean & EBean - one class per grade (9-12 students per class)	British international school for LBean & Ebean - 4 classes per grade (17-20 students per class)
ChinaBean’s preschool-2 mornings in English/2 in Mandarin	ChinaBean’s preschool-all Mandarin, all the time
Starbucks, what Starbucks?!  Just kidding, there’s now one 10 minutes away by car.	Starbucks?  Which one, I could walk to 5 within 10-20 minutes.
Heat!  We’re north of the Yangtze River, some places have government heat.	No heat for you!  South of the Yangtze, you’re out of luck.
IKEA - opened in August!	IKEA - 35 minute drive away
Expatriate community - it exists, but smaller	Expatriate community - 3 times the size of Xi’an!
Apartment living - 9th floor, 2 floors	Apartment living - 27t floor, one level
Amazing community of friends	Amazing community of friends

Piece of Humble Pie

Remember that time last weekend when I hopped on an airplane with LBean to go to her orthodontist appointment and I realized half-way through the flight that her appointment was actually the next weekend? Yes, that was my weekend.  How about yours?

Let me back up a bit.  LBean is of the age where orthodontics is a regular part of our monthly routine.  When we lived in Suzhou, we would drive the hour to Hongqiao (a Western-suburb/neighborhood of Shanghai) for her monthly orthodontist appointments.  After we moved to Xi’an, we talked with Jamie’s company about how to continue her orthodontic treatment and if it was even possible to continue her treatment in Xi’an.  It was decided that it would be best that LBean and one parent fly to Shanghai for her appointments.  It’s a 2 1/2 hour flight each way, so think about that the next time you’re sitting at the dentist or orthodontist waiting for your appointment!

Thankfully LBean’s orthodontist suggested that her appointments could be spaced out every 2-3 months and we won't have to make the flight every month.  And, I found out that other families in Xi’an have flown to Chang Mai, Thailand for orthodontic treatment, which made me feel a whole lot less ridiculous about it all.  At least we were staying in the country!

Checked in and ready to go

Speed ahead to this past Saturday.  LBean and I packed our bags, hopped on our flight and were enjoying some great mother/daughter time.  About half-way through the flight I decided I needed to double-check the time of the appointment so I could better plan our day.  As I was reaching for my planner a few thoughts converged…hmmm, I never got a text reminding me of her appointment, and wouldn’t that be funny if her appointment was next Saturday.

I opened my planner and staring back at me was her appointment time, which was listed for the next Saturday.  Right next to it in the notes section of my planner were our flights.  Why I didn’t put two and two together, I don’t know.  I put my head in my hands and LBean became concerned.  “Are you crying mom?”  I lifted my head and I was laughing.  I mean, really, who does something like this?  I just couldn’t stop laughing.  I said, “Just wait till I call your dad.  He won’t be mad.  At least I don’t think so…”

Starbucks helps our subway ride go well

We got off the plane and I immediately called the orthodontist’s office.  “Can you please confirm my daughter’s appointment?  Hmmm, next Saturday, well now I get to admit something very embarrassing to you.”  Thankfully, LBean’s orthodontist has three offices, 1 in Hong Kong, 1 in Hongqiao (where we were staying) and 1 in Pudong (closer to the big airport).  We were in luck because the doctor was in the other Shanghai office.  Instead of walking out the front door of our hotel and across the driveway to the Hongqiao office, LBean and I trekked to the other side of a 24 million person city.

We dropped our bags off at the hotel, grabbed a quick lunch and started our 1 1/2 hour journey to the other office.  We stood on the subway for an hour where we changed subway lines three times and then walked about 25 minutes to the other office.  But, we made it!  In the process we discovered a whole new part of Shanghai that we had not been to before.  LBean was such a good sport about it all and had a great attitude.

LBean enjoying her new book and taking a break.

Still happy and standing in line in Marks & Spencer

To break up the 90 minute return trip, we stopped at West Nanjing street for a little retail therapy and a snack at Marks & Spencer.  That night we celebrated our success with a tasty hotdog and cheeseburger from Blue Frog. (And, our waitress did ask why she hadn't seen us for a long time).  I told Jamie that the extra 3 hours we spent getting to the other office was my penance for making such a big mistake.  

Just a few people at the West Nanjing Road subway stop

LBean and I spent Sunday morning going through the import grocery store stocking up on a few things that I haven’t managed to find in Xi’an yet (or haven’t looked for on TaoBao).  We stopped at the Pearl Market for a few gifts for the little sisters and enjoyed one last tasty meal.  

We brought two big suitcases for our overnight trip.
You can see why! 

That is a proper stack of nachos.

The weekend turned out to be wonderful, but I dined on a big slice of humble pie for my mistake with a huge scoop of grace on the side.  I was right, Jamie was not mad and he has given me a lot of grace for my mistake.

I will consult my calendar before the next appointment.  I promise.

Avoiding Bitterness: Why Not Knowing is Okay

“So, you’re moving this summer, right? You’re moving back to the US?”

The question that keeps getting asked.  A lot. Well, actually we don’t know.  

“You mean Jamie doesn’t have a job?!”

Well, Jamie’s role during his time in China was to train up a Chinese national to take his position.  The time has come for the national to take over and we are excited about this!

“Can’t he just go back to the job he left in the US?”

Jamie’s company encourages their employees to move roles/positions/jobs every 3-5 years.  It is necessary for career development and learning new skills.  Jamie’s skills have grown, changed and evolved while we’ve been in China and a different position will be a better fit (just like if he would have been in a role for 4 years in the US).

“Is there a job for him?”

Well, in a large company it is really about timing.  What other people are also looking for their next position within the company and what positions will be available when we think we'll be moving?   This is the point that we’re at, looking at what might become available in the next 6 months.

“Don’t you want to move back to the US?”

Sure, that would be great.  Family, friends, cheese, driving and Target are all great things about the US.

“Don’t you want to have another expat assignment?”

Sure, that would also be great.  We love to travel and there are so many more places to see.  The experiences that our girls are having are shaping their world-view in such a positive manner.

“Aren’t you freaking out?”

Not yet.  I had tea with a friend last week and she mentioned that there were about 102 days between last Friday and their projected move day (at the end of the school year), which is potentially our move date.  She was meeting with the relocation people in the afternoon to start assessing their belongings and what it would take to move everything back to the US.  One hundred and two days is not long at all!

The conversation with my friend put me in a very reflective mood.  I started remembering all the feelings that I had before we moved to China and one of the emotions I had was bitterness.  I was excited to move, I was ready for an adventure, I was sad to leave family & friends, but our little family of four wanted to go.  We were choosing this.  However, as the process got started, emails started rolling in, the continuous stream of calls with lawyers, accountants, packers, etc. I developed a lot of bitterness.  I didn’t want to spend my last 8 weeks feeling harassed by my to-do list.  I had the distinct feeling that the only thing keeping me from breezily sailing through this move was me.  Me not willingly to stay up all hours of the night filling out forms, responding to emails, organizing our things, and marching through the to-do’s.  But, I couldn’t escape it and those things had to be done.

I wanted to spend the time leading up to the move savoring time with family, enjoying one more round of hugs and laughs with my closest girl friends and giving my girls an extra big dose of Americana to sustain us through the first 6 months of our move.

So for now, from my perspective, if we don’t know where we’re going, then I can’t have a moving to-do list.  Frankly, if an international move gets crammed into 30 days, then fine by me because it will be crazy and exhausting no matter how many days I am given.

I’m avoiding bitterness at all costs.  Instead, you can find me soaking up all things Suzhou and China and enjoying what time we have left here.

Time to Empty the Pantry

As an expat I think it’s pretty common to bring back food from your home country.  Sometimes it’s because the the same product is just ridiculously expensive-hello $10/box cereal.  (I even know one person who would freeze big blocks of cheese and hide them deep in her checked luggage.  The cheese would thaw during the flight, but still be cool when she landed.) Or, you stockpile because you just can’t find it in the country you’re living in (mmm, Girl Scout cookies, candy corn, etc.)  I also tend to buy multiples of things when they’re either one sale or just randomly happen to be in the store (butterscotch chips).

We think our time in Suzhou is limited, although we don’t know anything for certain.  So, I decided that it might be time to start eating from the pantry.  A few weeks ago I went to the store, bought $50 worth of food (although not just for one meal, but still) and all I managed to eliminate from my stockpile was a taco seasoning packet.  I must rethink my tactics.

For anyone who lived with me at 4-H House in college it brings back memories of the end of the semester.  If the commissar did a good job managing the finances, we’d have a surplus at the end of the semester, and we’d dine like queens during finals week.  Shrimp, steak and other foods we hadn’t eaten for a whole semester.  Except for our situation, I foresee a lot of tacos, tea, Crystal Light, lentils and butterscotch cookies in our future!

Chinese New Year: Married to Spiderman (& Batman)

The year of the horse is ending and the year of the sheep will begin soon.  Last night Jamie had his annual dinner at work to celebrate the upcoming Chinese New Year (CNY).  We've attended a few of these before...2012, 2013, and in 2014 (apparently I didn't blog about that one).  

I am always so impressed with everyone's willingness to participate in the entertainment.  It is common for different business groups at Jamie's company to perform dances, skits or songs and it is taken very seriously.  It's great that the expat employees embrace the experience too and take part in the celebrations.

This year Jamie had the option to perform a dance to a pop song that is very popular right now (Xiao Ping Guo-Little Apple) or dress-up in costume.  He voted for the costume.  

Now, I get to tell people that I'm married to Spiderman (and Batman too....flashback to EBean's Children's Day last year.)  Have I ever told you about how my husband is such a great sport?

Making his entrance

The big reveal!
The employees had to guess the name
of the person in the costume.

Some of the other expat husbands performing
their dance to Xiao Ping Guo. 

Some of the husbands (too many to fit
into a single picture!)

The supportive spouses.  I'm so glad that these women are
also friends.

Happy New Year!

Run Mama Run!

Today a few expat friends and I participated in the first Rainbow Run Suzhou.  In a country known for its exceptional knock-offs and copies, perhaps you can consider this run a knock-off of the the Color Run (which is coming to Shanghai, but reached capacity within 18 minutes of opening registration).  Copy or not, we had a great time!  

At certain points along the run participants are doused with colored chalk and by the finish line everyone is quite "colorful".  

White shirts and all clean.  That will change soon.

We arrived more than an hour before the race, which gave the local media plenty of time to interview the foreigners (all 10 of us).  I am pretty sure our faces and names are on CCTV, in the local newspaper and in many, many local Chinese We Chat feeds.

Talking to a newspaper reporter, such a good sport!

The emcee for the event talking to my friends.  They
were invited to come to the television station on another day
to play a game and perform a song and dance!

We added our hands to the wall.

We thought we should become friendly with the doctor on
site...just in case.  Turns out his daughter is studying in the US.

We decided to be friendly with the guards too.  

Anytime we stood still too long, this is what we saw.  They
were taking pictures of...us.

As we were waiting for the race to start, we saw a big group from the Caterpillar (the company my husband works for) plant in Suzhou .

I invited myself into the picture!

My cheering squad.  Although they somehow missed me crossing the finish line.  I must have been too fast.

Can you spot the Caterpillar flag?

 At the start...

And, the finish line.

Perhaps my children missed me at the finish line because they were at the coffee shop eating nuts.  Hmmm.

All done and very colorful.

We made it!

We had become living/breathing rainbows.

No one wanted to give me a hug!

They did pose for a picture.

And while we were posing, a few others decided to take our photo too.

Give mama a kiss!

 That's better!

I can now cross "running a race in China" off my bucket list. Check!